Hungry thugs made off with 90 pounds of Pacific oysters taken out of the back of a truck in Rittenhouse Square. Distributor Paul Appleby of SeaFresh Oysters said that after making deliveries to Parc and The Dandelion, he headed to Morimoto only to find two boxes gone, which added up to around 1,000 missing mollusks. Appleby estimated the value to be around $500 (more like $1,200 - $1,500 to those of us on the other side of the bar) and wasn't sure if he would be filing a police report.
Be on the lookout for black market Kusshis around town, and the possibility of a new "shuckeasy" on the corner of your block. Please make sure to reach out to us via the tipline if your local pub that's only known for dirty water dogs starts offering oysters as a special, and they look like they were opened with a screwdriver.