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Are These The 25 Douchiest Bars In Philly?

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Guy Fieri, the patron saint of douche, approves of this list
Guy Fieri, the patron saint of douche, approves of this list
Photo: The Chive

Complex released a list of the 25 Douchiest Bars in Philadelphia, and takes aim at a bunch of establishments that are truly easy targets. They attempt to make the list look well-rounded by adding a clutch of "hipster" bars, but have completely ignored another subset of douchedom, which may show what audience they're truly targeting: The Rittenhouse Douche.

Complex, which appears to be pretty douchey in it's own right—they have a section devoted to "girls" (the gender, not the show), and more than a few of their posts have the word "hook-up" in the header—does make valid points about all of the bars they put on blast. But, they would have done themselves a favor by making this list exhaustive, and not naming so many places that are carbon copies of douche originals. Also, it's hard to take you seriously when readers are greeted with a monster-sized video ad about some Dr. Pepper summer bullshit.

1. McFadden’s
2. Rumor
3. Mad River Manayunk
4. Kildare’s
5. Bamboo Bar
6. Cavanaugh’s River Deck
7. G Lounge
8. Whisper
9. The Barbary
10. Drinker’s Tavern
11. Fat Tuesday
12. Finnigan’s Wake
13. Paddy Whack’s
14. Lucy’s Hat Shop
15. PYT
16. Manayunk Brewing Co.
17. The Plough & The Stars
18. Ladder 15
19. Zee Bar
20 The Field House
21. Recess Lounge
22. J.D. McGillicuddy’s
23. The Fox & Hound
24. LiT UltraBar
25. Xfinity Live!

At first glance, it's a pretty solid list. But, the only groups they're taking shots at here are popped-collar bros, and the "edgy" choices of faux-hipsterdom with The Barbary and PYT. But, what about the tanorexic D&G skeezers at Continental Midtown? The old-balled, loafer-wearing, eye-rolling jerks at Rouge? And, let's not forget about the self-important beer snobs that won't drink anything that isn't aged in first-growth wine barrels, studded with virginal hops from Sam Calagione's garden.

What we really need here is a better understanding of the word "douche." And, that's something we can all get behind. Lastly, where's Irish Pub? That place is full of douchebags.

· The 25 Douchiest Bars in Philadelphia [Complex]